Monday, June 26, 2006

Bottled Sperm, Bare Asses & Animal Carcasses

Dear Friends,

Fuck me (A statement, NOT a request.). What a long weekend. To be honest, I'm still a bit foggy. There's so much to tell, and I've so little time. I can only cover the highlights. So here goes...

At about noon on Friday, I received this text message from my friend Leadley: Afternoon cocktails?

Me: Uh, some of us actually work for a living, you k

Leadley: Later then.

Me: Ok, where?

Leadley: Brian and Steve's new place.

T-R-O-U-B-L-E. But me? I'm always up for a challenge. So,
after work, I picked up the BF, and we drove towards Uptown to meet Leadley. What transpired next can only be described as drunken debauchery gone awry.

Leadley was on a mission. See, he's petrified of flying, and he had a 10 o'clock flight to Vegas the next morning. His idea? Get as fucked up as humanly possible so that he could pass out the moment he boarded the plane. Here's what I remember:

1. Many, many shots of Jameson poured by Alex, the "flair" bartender. Oh, yeah! He also breathes fire.

2. I met Mr. Krugy! I can't wait to see the sick comments you g
uys will come up with for this one.

3. There were women walking around in their underwear in the bar. Apparently, they've got a burlesque show every Friday evening. Unfortunately, none of them were hot, so we left.

Everything else after that was pretty much a blur, and I still don't know if Leadley ever made it to Vegas.

Obviously, Saturday was pretty much a wash. Outside of getting up long enough to have breakfast, we slept until I had to get up and get ready for work. It was a relatively uneventful night, but the money was solid and I didn't have to tell anyone to fuck off, so there's that.

On Sunday afternoon, the BF & I went to the tail-end (no pun inte
nded) of the Gay Pride parade. It's always a great deal of fun, and perfect for watching people in all of their hedonistic glory. Nothing but peace, love and happiness...with a little ecstasy thrown in for good measure. We saw lots of this:

And plenty of this...

Now, don't get me wrong. I LOVE gay men. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE them. But I don't need to see their hairy asses. I don't want to see ANYBODY'S hairy ass. It's just wrong, people! Can we please go back to last year's trend of white tanktops, camouflage kilts and combat boots?

After we had our fill of people-watching, we headed off to our next destination...Dolly's Revenge. This is an annual event thrown by the Greek boyfriend of a co-worker which celebrates all things "lamb." This was the first year that I was able to attend, and I'm still not sure how I feel about it.

Walking in to the party, all I could see was a gutted animal, roasting on a spit. I'm by no means vegetarian, but to be honest, seeing that thing up there, split open and roasting, nearly made me vomit. Worse yet was the fact that they were playing Yanni in the background. Neither the BF nor I could take it any longer, so we left...and got Thai food instead.

I think that pretty much covers it. Stay tuned for next weekend...I've got friends in town, and they've thrown down the gauntlet. I'm pretty sure I'll need a new liver by next Monday.

Have a great week!



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