Holy hell. I had no idea what I'd be getting myself in to when I decided to open up my blog to your questions. Let me tell you, folks, you certainly stuck it to me with some of them! I am a bit surprised at how deeply some of you probed in to my relationship, but then, I suppose I shouldn't be. I have been quite vague when it comes to the details, so I guess it's only natural curiosity on your part. Mind you, none of the questions about him were difficult to answer, and in the end, I'm quite glad you asked. It really only confirmed what I already knew to be true. I'm a happy, lucky, and 100% in-love woman.
As for the rest of your questions, they were funny and thoughtful, and I’m grateful that you all took the time to ask. In the end, I’m glad I did this. I had just as much fun answering your questions as I did reading them. So, without further ado, your answers…
In a way that won't reveal his identity, tell us how you met the man you are going to move 9,000 miles to be with.
On the internet. And no, not on one of those match.com thingies. That’s as much as I’m giving up. But it is a great story, and some day, I’ll tell it.
What is the one thing in the bedroom that turns you on the most?
That’s easy. My boyfriend. Specifically? The way he kisses me.
When did you wake up and say "I think I'll bartend for a while?"
It wasn’t a “wake up and realize” kind of moment. I wanted a job where I’d make tons of cash while home from college. I didn’t want to be a stripper, so I chose bartending.
What’s your most favorite drink to make? Least favorite?
If I had my choice, everyone would drink straight booze & beer. BUT, if I have to choose, I’d say my Mai Tai. Gives Bob Chinn’s recipe a run for its money. My least favorite? Fucking Grasshoppers.
What did you want to be/do when you were a kid?
That changed all the time. Let’s see if I can remember them all. Professional figure skater, actress, doctor, lawyer, teacher…oh, and after seeing Top Gun, I wanted to be a Naval Aviator. But my vision sucks, so my hopes were dashed.
If you were a tree what kind of tree would you be?
If you were a fruit, what neighborhood would you live in?
Boy’s Town, of course! (Unless you live in Chicago, this will make absolutely no sense to you.)
Have you ever been naked with someone from the Circus?
Hey, those records were sealed!
Where did all the Orange Roughy go?
In my belly.
Were there ever any WMD’s?
According to Dick Cheney, yes. And you know he’s always right.
Do you believe that the comparison that a cup of coffee costs 6 bucks at Starfucks makes it ok that a gallon of gas costs $3?
Starfucks. That’s funny. Sorry, what was the question?
Have you ever dropped a man for having bad toenails?
No, but I dropped a man for painting his toenails.
Does your current lover have a goatee?
Why did mommy not want me?
Honey, I’m a bartender, not a real therapist. Have a shot and a beer and shut the fuck up.
Anonymous # 1 asks:
You have lovely breasts...are they real?
Yes, and they’re fabulous.
Is the man from Clublife as big an arse as he seems? Not asking you to reveal his identity, I just find it hard to understand how the two of you can be friends.
The truth is, while he can be a pain in the arse, he’s one of the nicest people I know. Remember, what you read on a blog is only a PART of who a person really is. There’s a whole other side to him, just like there’s a whole other side to me. So be nice.
Lovely Lucy asks:
Because, like you, I'm a little PMS-y at the moment - what's your favourite insult?
Calling a sleazy whore a “Cum receptacle.”
Also what are things you would accept a few years ago from boys that you no longer tolerate today? (This is a blatant advice grab)
I really hate to disappoint you here, but I’ve pretty much always been the same as far as what I’ll accept from men. Too much BS and I’m out the door.
Oh and your favourite moment/memory that always makes you smile? (not involving the boy :))
Easy. Watching my grandmother’s reaction to finding her father and mother’s homes in Italy. I’ve never seen someone so happy and grateful.
Oh and how'd you get so cool?
Vegas Vixen asks:
What is your biggest concern in regards to your upcoming move?
Up until very recently, my biggest concern was that I’d get there, and the boyfriend would realize he didn’t really love me after all. Now, I think my biggest concern is dealing with the heat! ;)
Do you work in a sports Bar and serve only wankers that vomit after the local team loses?
The funny thing is, Scorpy, I DON’T work in a sports bar. It’s the least sports-bar like place I know. But yes, lately, all I’ve served are wankers that vomit.
What generally is a good rule of thumb for tips without seeming like you're trying to schmooze the bartender or flash cash?
Glad you asked, Gus. I subscribe to the “buck-a-beer” policy. That’s completely fair. Now, if you’re buying multiple beers and drinks, 15% of the total is appropriate. If you ask me to make ten fruity-ass martinis in the middle of post-game rush hour, be prepared to either tip big or face my wrath.
Anonymous # 2 asks, and asks and asks some more:
Do you trust the new BF to have told you everything you need to know about his past?
I haven’t asked about his past in specifics, because it doesn’t matter to me. Who he is today is all that matters.
Have you ever been only reliant on a man for money/shelter/company (other than your father) before?
Never. I’ve always taken care of myself. Hell, I stopped leeching of my parents when I was 18.
Will you get married to him just to secure a visa or wait until you have actually spent some real time together?
We’ve discussed this at great length. We want to wait and do it the right way.
Have you ever lived anywhere other than the U.S.?
No, but I’ve traveled a good deal.
How long have you actually known your new boyfriend?
Not very long in some people’s eyes…but long enough to know that this is right.
Without asking him - what do you think he sees in you, other than your physical assets?
I don’t have to ask him. He tells me all the time. Sense of humor, intelligence, passion, common interests, etc. But I’m pretty certain his favorite thing about me is my ass.
What is the longest time you've gone between relationships? The shortest? Have you ever had overlapping relationships?
As for your first two questions, I’ve never kept track. As for your final question, no. At least, not committed relationships. I have casually dated more than one man at a time.
Do you and the new BF have the same ideas about having children, and how they are raised?
Yes, and we were raised very similarly, so that’s another bonus.
Is there anything your BF has asked you to change about yourself, and is there anything you wouldn’t change?
Question one: No. Question two: My boobs?
Where do you stand on divorce?
Never have been, never will be.
Have you ever drastically changed your hair color?
Holy crap! My hair has been nearly every color of the rainbow…including an unintentional and nasty shade of green.
Why doesn't he move in with you? Is his career more important to him than yours or even more important than being with you?
Simple. He has a contract, and I don’t. He’s thought of quitting and coming here to the US, but it’s just better this way for now. He’s also said that if I’m unhappy living there when his contract expires, we’ll move anywhere we want.
How tall are you?
How would you feel if you found out he was sleeping with someone else, while you are together in theory but apart in distance? Would it make a difference if it was a casual fling or with someone he actually has feelings for?
Never thought about it, really, because I know he wouldn’t cheat.
Do you have any bad habits that you want to stop/change?
Do you ever wonder if you/he are so fickle that you will fall out of love just as quickly as you have fallen in?
No, I don’t.
Has anyone in your real life tried to talk you out of moving?
Nope. All of my family and my closest friends are totally supportive of it.
Are there any of these questions that you have asked yourself?
Why would I have to? You’ve already asked all of them for me.
Do you prefer to be come on or in? If so where?
Well, I can’t think of an appropriate answer for such an inappropriate question, but all I can tell you is that I’ve never been a fan of cleaning up other people’s messes. I hope that answers your question.
Anonymous # 3 asks:
Do you want to have kids? If not now, when/under what conditions?
I’ve always said I’d be happy whether or not I had kids. I’ve never been one of those women who thought I’d feel incomplete without them. That said, now that I’ve found the right person, I can’t imagine not sharing that experience with him. As for when, we’d ideally like to wait a few years. As for under what conditions, well, the truth is, no matter how prepared a person thinks they are, they’re never FULLY prepared for children. So, we’ll take it as it comes, and do the very best we can.
So, there you go. Just a little bit of the woman behind the fairy.