Thursday, December 01, 2005

A Very Good Day

While I was out driving earlier, the song "Clint Eastwood" by those fabulous GORILLAZ guys came on the radio. I'd never really paid attention to the words, but today, for some reason, they popped right out at me. Apparently, I'm hyper-sensitive lately. Go Figure.
I ain't happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm useless but not for long
The future is coming on
Funny, but I never thought of these guys as lyrical poets. Sure, they could lay down a hell of a snappy tune, but who knew they were therapists, too?
You see, I had a good day today. Not that I was particularly happy, mind you, but I just felt, well, better. Better, in my opinion, is good.
Last night I was thinking back on relationships past, and I realized something. We don't ACTUALLY die when things end. You may feel like it for a time, but even that eventually fades. This, of course, got me to thinking. If we know for a fact we'll eventually be alright, why can't we just fast-forward to that point? Wouldn't that be the best-case scenario?
The more I thought about that, though, the more I was certain that we'd be doing ourselves a great disservice by trying to rush ourselves along in the process. Maybe (and this is only my theory, so feel free to discount it if you'd like) we're supposed to feel the hurt. Maybe it's meant to be that way, to serve as a reminder of what can happen if we're not careful with the choices we make. Like when we were kids, and our moms' spanked us when we did something wrong. Experiencing the consequences of our actions is really the only way to learn from our mistakes.
Bet you won't be doing that again!
Armed with that knowledge, I woke up today realizing that I was going to be ok. I knew that I'd learn something from this whole bloody mess, and for the first time in a long time, I'm looking forward to tomorrow.
My future...It's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on...

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